What is the dispute about? After all, the thread remains the same, the material does not change, and the heat treatment of the bolt and its strength do not change.
The 10.9 bolt has a tensile strength limit of 1000MPa and a yield strength of about 900MPa. Instead, you can screw in A4-90 bolts with a tensile strength of 1030-1100MPa, yield strength 900MPa, the bolt can protrude from the nut as much as it wants and will not rust, unscrewing it will never be a problem.
Regarding vibrations, 12.9 is found at the connecting rod feet, main bearing caps, at the flywheel, where vibrations and loads are enormous, and rigid materials. The suspension is full of damping and spring elements, the body itself is springy and absorbs vibrations well.